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Six people who laugh in the face of gym etiquette

May 11th 2014 / Ayesha Muttucumaru Google+ Six people who laugh in the face of gym etiquette


Warning: don’t let these six gym floor nemeses ruin your workout

From nudity to decibel-level grunting, when did good gym etiquette become a thing of the past?

Sure, we’re all there to de-stress and get a bit more toned for bikini season, but one scan across the gym floor and you’re bound to see the following gym etiquette rule-breakers ready to ruin your workout.

With gym-goers in full force in the lead up to summer, which keep-fit antagonists should you be on the lookout for? Here are the six worst culprits that we’ve come across during our treadmill travels and how best to avoid them should you spot them at a gym near you...

Mr You’re So Vain

How to Spot: Muscle tank, lifting weights in front of a mirror, a pro at making eye contact. With himself.

How to Avoid: Never walk in his line of vision. And avoid wearing anything reflective.

Mr Splash and Dash

How to Spot: Sweating profusely on self and on surrounding gym equipment, blissfully unaware of sanitising spray, never wipes up after himself, generally wet.

How to Avoid: Always maintain a one-machine gap between you and the sweat-soaked suspect to avoid infiltrating the ‘splash zone.’

Mr Grunter

How to Spot: You’ll hear them.

How to Avoid: You’ll hear them. Pack your headphones.

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Ms Know-it-all

How to Spot: Unqualified, always talking about ‘proper form’, always has an opinion. Even if you didn’t ask for it.

How to Avoid: ‘Where did you get your fitness qualification from? Oh, you don’t have one?’ End of conversation.

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Mr Anti Anti-perspirant

How to Spot: You’ll smell them.

How to Avoid: Don’t get caught up in their updraft and position yourself under an air conditioning vent. Also, dab Vicks Vaporub above your upper lip to avoid being floored by gym floor gag factor.

Ms No Inhibitions

How to Spot: BOOBIES and an aversion to towels in the changing room.

How to Avoid: Learn how to strip, shower and split in record time. There’s no time for conversation when you’re stuck in your trouser leg.

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