With DOI, CBB and now Splash!, the celebrity TV shows are just a bit OTT writes Judy Johnson

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You'd think, given that party season is over and we're all nursing our post-Christmas blues while trying to detox  our way through January, that the TV gods might provide us with some entertainment to make staying indoors more appealing.

But no. Instead of treating us to some top-notch drama to fill that Homeland-shaped hole, they've given us celebrities. And more celebrities. And celebrities who aren't really celebrities anymore but are now celebrities again because they're invading our living rooms and sporting the most fakest of tans we've ever seen (Matt Lapinskas, we're talking to  you).

With Celebrity Big Brother starting last week, viewers gave in to their sofas and watched as countless attention-seekers took to the famous house, including the likes of The X Factor contestant Rylan and Steps' Claire Richards (who was immediately the subject of bitchy tweets commenting on her weight - come on Twitter, where's the sisterhood?). A few days in, here at GTG we’re hoping BB will leave them in there - though if someone could tell Gillian that GTG would like to look like her when we're 57, that'd be great.

Next came Splash!, the weirdest concept for a TV show we have ever come across: Olympic star Tom Daley teaches celebrities how to dive. Then a judging panel which includes Jo Brand - nope, we don't get it either - will score them before viewers vote and the bottom two face a 'Splash!-off', which sadly isn't a contest to see who can splash the other in the eye first. While we're sure it takes guts to don those swimsuits and jump off a plank, we're just not sure that we need to witness comedians and presenters doing exactly that.

Dancing On Ice is of course far more enjoyable - there are sequins, frosty judges and accidents aplenty, but by the time we'd caught up with BB and Splash!, having to see Pamela Anderson skate her way to last place left us feeling cold.

Celebrities, we love you, but there's only so much we can take when it comes to seeing you scantily-clad in your personal-trained best, particularly when we're fighting the chocolate urge that makes up for the lack of mince pies…