A little bit of perfectionism can be a good thing - being well presented work, having an impeccably decorated house or a string of high achievements can be the outcome. However, what happens when that nit-picking voice starts to pile on too much pressure, leaving you struggling under the weight of never ending competition with yourself?
We reached out to Clinical Hynotherapist and Life Coach, Jacqueline Hurst , to hear her tips on what to do when aiming for greatness turns into a disastrous quest for flawlessness.
Feel the fear
“Perfectionism is a safety net for scared people,” says Jacqueline. “It’s the same with procrastination. We only ever procrastinate if we are inverse perfectionists. The first tip is to let go of thinking that it won’t be right if it isn’t perfect and step into the unknown - just do the best you can with what you’ve got. We can always build on things, but we can’t build on things if we aren’t putting them out there due to ‘fear’. Fear is a four letter word so take the bull by the horns - feel the fear and do it anyway.”
“Think about what you are thinking about,” says Jacqueline. “Are your thoughts working for or against you? Are you freaking yourself out with the ‘what if it all goes wrong?’ record? If so, try swapping that thought to ‘and what if it all goes right….?'” Simply believing in your own ability to be successful could see you go the extra mile.
Do it for you
“If you are worrying about what anyone else might think, you need to recalibrate your thoughts. Is whatever you are doing ultimately because you want to be proud and happy or is it to impress others? Trying to impress anyone other than yourself is exhausting. YOU being proud of what YOU achieve is all that matters. Let the rest go.”
Hone your emotions
“Emotions and feelings are created by our thoughts,” says Jacqueline. “If we choose the right thoughts, we get the right feelings. Ask yourself what feeling you want and then start working your thoughts towards achieving this. Use a notepad and write this stuff down - it’s extremely powerful.”
“Doing the best you can with what you’ve got is good enough - it’s important to remember that,” says Jacqueline. “Check your expectation levels and measure whether they are realistic or unrealistic. Would you be demanding the same performance or outcome from your daughter/best friend/colleague?” If not, you may be pushing yourself too far. “Check your thoughts, check your perspective and check your expectations.”
For more tips and tricks on life management from Jacqueline, head to www.thelifeclass.com .